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as you can see, i've become a bit of a misfit

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(no subject) [Apr. 11th, 2010|06:52 am]
as you can see, i've become a bit of a misfit
why do boys gotta b cute sometimes, makes life enriched with desire i'd say.
it's just seems to be hard to c anybody...
but goddamn what a saturday night spent, waiting on three bars
gaddamn gaddamn...
makes me wish i had a good excuse to come home to.
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(no subject) [Mar. 31st, 2010|10:18 pm]
as you can see, i've become a bit of a misfit
haha, problems solved. void filled. 2 jello shots and 2 firebombs later... and i find myself drunk. everywhere i needed to be all at the right moment, and honestly guyzz the shit just came together. 46 minutes later and i was able to respond to the memory... and everywhere the cinnoman spews i was able to referbish. i've found a little hope for april... but only because i was silenced to the point of burning on the teacher... so i got a problem of logic to deal with. all else i got to work with is how badass i am at makin a big 0 comfy bed...
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(no subject) [Mar. 30th, 2010|07:35 am]
as you can see, i've become a bit of a misfit
i know i shouldn't be here but... look at this void man.

i still have have that gusto in me to admit i'm never bored.

but man, it sure looks blank whenever i come home, or where ever i go.
'cept what i write, but those words are still null because they only hold any distinction to myself.
See, i'm figuring april is the problem,
sun is shining and flowers are blooming,
and there ain't shit i wanna do in the bask of it all.
make my money at night, say all the right things to strangers in the false light,
and visualize some pretty gorish things as the sun rises.
i see beautiful people when i'm out, and my 7 minute cigarette is like that game in the closet.
yet all my dreams are day-to-day sequences of surviving various apocolypses.

but see, not much of this reality holds any benevolence when i do stand,
when i sit in the dark i prefer it in silence, mind you i prefer the dark.
and although it sometimes feels like "i live in grand central station" ... i still won't answer to anyone.
everything i want is at my mother fucking finger tips, except for this stupid ass april in my way.
i guess the only way to explain how i feel is to define the size of this void.
but not as a fraction, because i'm sitting on my reference point.
the future freaks me out because i've never met neone better then a fuck up with potential.
i want art, i want music, i want to create, but i just don't want to turn the light on...
...it totally ruins my down time.
ugh, i just don't know how much longer i can make it without change.
and i just straight up won't be as good of an associate if i did change.
fuck i deserve something but i don't know what.

and this is the intrusion as to why i'm never bored.
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(no subject) [Mar. 20th, 2010|08:43 am]
as you can see, i've become a bit of a misfit
good news guys the temp. hit the dew point leading to precipitation, then the temp dropped below freezing and therefore we have snow. hopefully i can sleep and it will disappear, but it'll with still rain all weekend.
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(no subject) [Mar. 18th, 2010|04:45 pm]
as you can see, i've become a bit of a misfit
why is it everytime i get physical with a boy, all sense of self control goes out the window.

its because they don't have any to begin with.
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(no subject) [Mar. 15th, 2010|12:57 pm]
as you can see, i've become a bit of a misfit
the other side of the world called today. and i just blew it off like it was any other state calling. blast my apathy.
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(no subject) [Mar. 14th, 2010|12:33 pm]
as you can see, i've become a bit of a misfit
its that time again. where my ambition is trumped by my anxieties. where all the most rational thoughts in my head sound unspeakable when i need to share them the most. therefore im left speaking in methaphor, and all that i want to say is left unsaid. it's just that, if i say it... it's gunna sound wrong later. only because the person who needs to hear it is on the other side of the world, and the spring is going to be ruined by my need to reach its end. goddamn it i need to take care of all my debtors and professors before i even being to think about the things that i want to say. i'm going to go into work early for a ten hour shift with the most selffish asain... then i have to do homework and somehow find it within me to sleep without my antipsychotic. punchline... now that i have one heartshaped uterius... its that time again, where i hate that motherfucker.
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(no subject) [Feb. 28th, 2010|07:08 pm]
as you can see, i've become a bit of a misfit
i had different friends along time ago
now i just do homework.

i had a dream i was doing homework with my old crew, and ironically i would have rather woken up before dark then stay there. lol.

those people deleted me off their friends page too so all the more giggles.
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(no subject) [Jan. 27th, 2010|09:29 pm]
as you can see, i've become a bit of a misfit
My life:

hours of homework
take a break from homework and go to work (where i can't do homework)
and then go to bed and not sleep enough because i have homework to do.

i don't want friends.
i don't want happy.
i just want a better life,

and karate,

and maybe to see duckbomb at palmer hall?
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(no subject) [Dec. 9th, 2009|07:29 pm]
as you can see, i've become a bit of a misfit
what the fuck are you suppose to do when you arn't very good at telling a lie, but are unable to even dare to bring the right questions to consciousness.

you sound alot like me with a boyfriend.
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